Setting Boundaries To Thrive

A Summary of the Boundaries Book Study

During the months of January and March we discussed the book, Boundaries by Dr. H. Cloud and Dr. J. Townsend. The discussion was filled with relatable boundary infringements and resistance in every area of life. The authors clearly defined what boundaries are, their importance and the conflicts that can arise due to a lack of boundaries. Setting boundaries helps us to take ownership of our lives and “to be responsible stewards over the life (God) has given us.” Is there a woman doesn’t need to know what she is responsible for to navigate her life and responsibilities to the fullest for God’s glory. When we are not at our best, we do not have healthy life-giving, transformative relationships in the home, church or workplace. According to the authors, boundaries protect our freedom to be and do what we were created to be and do and to protect our hearts.

The book was concise and provided practical ways to implement boundaries in our relationships whether personal or professional. Are you having problems dealing with a co-worker? You may need to set boundaries. Are you always saying yes, when you really want to say, “no?” The most basic boundary-setting word is no.” As a young parent, have you taught your child age-appropriate boundaries? The authors note, “the earlier the child learns good boundaries, the less turmoil he or she experiences later in life.” They go on to say, “Godly parenting, seeks to help children learn to think, make decisions, and master their environment in all aspects of life” (Pg 182). Finally, does your life feel out-of-control? The book addresses boundary problems with ourselves such as food, money, time, task completion, words, sexuality, and substance abuse. The authors point out that, “developing strength and maturity in self-boundaries is not easy. Many obstacles hinder our progress; however, God desires our maturity and self-control even more that we do.” (Pg 248).

This is a book all women will benefit from reading, especially young mothers. There are chapters addressing boundaries with the spouse, children, family and God. Developing and implementing healthy boundaries will help each of us thrive at every stage of life. As nurturers, some women have the tendency to take on others’ responsibilities to keep their environment running efficiently or to maintain peace. This book helps the reader dispel “the fear of standing up and saying no to unbiblical responsibility.”

“The inability to set appropriate boundaries at appropriate times

with the appropriate people can be very destructive.”

Dr. H. Cloud & Dr J. Townsend